I Admit That Words Fail Me Here

How in the name of a fu**ing goat can the president get away with being against the singing of the national anthem in a foreign language?? He's against it? What does he care? It's the sort of brave stand that's so cartoonishly silly that it makes nuking Germany on a whim sensible in comparison. "We have to save America from the sound of the national anthem in Spanish" -- it has a sort of anti-poetry, hearkening to a promised land of yokels tilling soil with their bare hands and dirty, bare-footed kids begging in the streets, that only Bush could foist on the media without eliciting hoots of derision. Because, you see, people really expect no better of him. He is now, finally, officially, a drooling child napping in the middle of the day while America goes to shyte around him. A grateful nation hands him his nightcap and bids him godspeed to dreamland.

What makes it so funny -- and this is verbatim -- is Bush's rationale:

"I think people who want to be a citizen of this country ought to learn English and they ought to learn to sing the national anthem in English," Bush said.

He thinks the whole point is that people are refusing to learn the English version. Never mind that Wyclef Jean, whom Bush has obviously never heard of, sells millions of records writing extremely intelligent lyrics that remain a sort of gold standard for hip hop -- this whole fricasee fiasco could be solved if these damn singers would just pick up an Espanol-Ingles dictionary and start learnin' a speck of American.